this feels final


this feels final
it hangs in the air
like the yellow turning leaves of the old maple
dripping with the dreary October drizzle

in my mind I see —
a pile of crisp leaves shaking, full of bundled children laughing

feet reaching to touch the sky, swinging and swooping
fresh green grass sparkling in the summer sun
as the tiny bare feet

dash through scattered drops and rainbow sprays

pristine fluffy mounds molded into snowpals and monsters
mud, sand, soil and water
child-made disasters and deluges

training wheels, roller blades, wagons, scooters
chalk scrawled creations adorning the common concrete squares 

daffodils, lilacs, roses, day lilies, hostas blooming growing
boy and girl, back-pack laden, blinking into the sun in first-day-of-school finery

trees we planted
prairie fire, towering ash,
and seedling tulip
now silently standing tall there by the playhouse we built
finally bloom-filled this spring —
oh, and planted by parents —
proof progeny of my Indiana childhood, as the children now tower and bloom

sleepless nights, celebrations, sickness and health
singing, shouting, studying, creating
seconds tick into years
family, friends, faith
joy and sorrow
and always love

tears finally fall
following months and streams of tears

the floors have been swept
the heat, turned off
the last notes have been played
the screen door slams shut

close and lock
belt clicks
put it in drive
then pull away
rending past from present
and future

–poem written by Jill Hasker

old maple

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I am a pianist, musician, music teacher, choir director, mother, wife, daughter, sister, cousin, sister-in-law, friend, neighbor. I enjoy music (of course!), quilting, sewing, beading, traveling, kayaking, camping, biking, hiking, gardening, knitting, scrapbooking, cooking, reading, poetry, drinking good coffee, and having fun with family and friends. NOTE -- Creative Commons License: All work of The Tromp Queen (quirkyjazz, aka Jill) is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 4.0 Unported License.

4 thoughts on “this feels final”

  1. We finally did sell it! The deal was finalized in the fall of 2014. The new family rented the house beginning July 1. After all the sorrow and farewells, the sale was barely a blip. Life goes on.

  2. AND…..NOT so final after all. The deal fell through after the inspection. The prospective buyers were scared off by the list of “fixes” the inspector found on our 125 year old house. (We just shrugged and said, “yeah, we know.” It is an old house. There is always something that needs to be fixed. Sigh. The saga continues and we have a beautiful old house sitting empty in need of a family to love it.

  3. Turns out this really WAS final. We have accepted an offer on our house, and we close in the next couple of weeks. I’m so glad I took the time to write my impressions of this day, this feeling of finality.

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